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Rise of the Sourdough

comedyEveryone
5 contributors · 5 paragraphs deep

Gerald, thrilled to be loved, decided to help around the house. By Friday he had risen into the walls, the couch, and Nadia's slippers. Every surface was warm, soft, and faintly yeasty. "This is too much love, Gerald," Nadia wheezed, peeling dough off the ceiling. The jar wrote back: NEVER.

Nadia called an emergency family meeting with the blob. "Boundaries, Gerald," she said firmly. "You can have the kitchen. Not my slippers." Gerald thought it over, then slowly pulled back from the walls, the couch, and the ceiling, into his jar. A small note appeared: SORRY. EXCITED. They drew a chalk line on the floor and shook on it.

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